


"Dan literally just fell out of the closet"

by umathurmanjustwatchedmehavesex



Series: Days in the Married Life of Dan and Phil [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Coming Out, Domestic Phan, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Marriage, Wedding, as in Dan literally falls out of a closet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-14 03:47:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7151789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/umathurmanjustwatchedmehavesex/pseuds/umathurmanjustwatchedmehavesex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's November 2017, Dan and Phil have just gotten married, and Phil uploads a video talking about the wedding and why he and Dan decided to tie the knot. Vlogging format, second part of a series of married!Phan, would recommend reading the first part before this one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dan literally just fell out of the closet

**Author's Note:**

> Vlogging format, so I've left most of the jumpcuts up to your imagination as it's a bit clunky to add all the ones I think would be there in, so I've only added the most necessary ones. Generally, a new paragraph is probably a jumpcut, the rest is up to you! Enjoy!

“Hey guys!”

[The wardrobe doors burst open. Phil manages to stay upright as he says his usual greeting but Dan stumbles over… something and falls flat on his face. The sound of him groaning can be heard has Phil looks down on him, not looking all too concerned.]

“Dan literally just fell out of the closet.”

“Don't mind me, just going to lie here and regret everything about my life.”

“Even marrying me?”

“ _Especially_ marrying you.”

“That’s not nice. Oh, and, on that note –”

[Phil looks back at the camera with a jubilant smile.]

“– me and Dan got married! We’ve got rings and everything, how cool is that?”

[Dan props himself up on his elbows and raises his eyebrows at his husband.]

“Yes, Phil. _Cool_ is definitely the best way to summarise our life-long commitment to each other.”

“I said the rings were cool, not us being married.”

[Dan shakes his head at the camera with a fond smile.]

“Honestly, such a romantic.”

[Jumpcut to Phil sitting on the bed in _their_ bedroom: a green glass sits on the left bedside table, a clear one on the right bedside table. Phil is smiling, and a simple gold band can be seen on his ring finger as he chats to the camera.]

“So, I’ve somehow managed to acquire a husband, who many of you know as _danisnotonfire_ or Dan Howell – legally, we both now have the surname Howell-Lester, but we’re both probably going to remain professionally known as Phil Lester and Dan Howell, but please feel free to refer to us as whatever, it’s not really a big deal to us. Said husband made a video on his channel talking about the more serious stuff – why we’ve decided to come out, why now, et cetera, you should definitely go check that out – but I thought this video might deal more with the fun stuff! Like the wedding!”

[The sound of his iconic HOORAY plays as he throws his hands in the air.]

“I will talk about some of the more serious stuff later, but I just really wanted to talk about the wedding which _I_ really enjoyed, far more than I thought I would. Dan says I probably enjoyed it a bit _too_ much, but I was _not_ the one who cried through pretty much the entirety of the speeches, so I think I win that argument.”

“I won’t go through the entire day because… it was a really long day. Don’t get me wrong, it was probably one of the best days of my life, bar the first time I actually met Dan - but, from someone who has been on tour, it was a _really_ long day. A lot of the pictures will be going up, probably on Twitter or Facebook or something, haven’t decided yet, but I will give you a quick breakdown of the day that I, Phil Lester, married one Dan Howell.”

[Jumpcut to sign on saying **THE HOWELL-LESTER WEDDING EXTRAVAGANZA** , Phil saying the words in an overdramatic, edited voice.]

“So, we got married in Manchester about a month ago – I’m not sure when this is going to be uploaded, so we might have been married for a month by the time that happens, how cool is that? We considered having it in London, but Manchester has a _lot_ of significance to us as a city – it’s where we first met, where we first lived together – plus it’s closer to my parent’s house for a post-wedding brunch the next day, and was hopefully slightly less conspicuous than getting married in London.”

“As for the venue, we got married in a _theatre_ – in the Lowry, in fact, where we had our show – because neither of us are really religious so a church was out of the question, plus we have spent so much time on a stage in the past two years that it just felt kind of right to get married on one? Not the most packed audience we’ve had, I’ll be honest, but so many of our friends and family managed to come which was really, really sweet, especially as it was on a Thursday.”

“Cat was my groomsmaid, despite living across the Atlantic Ocean – by which I mean Youtuber catrific, we’ve done quite a few collabs in the past and she’s honestly to this day one of my best friends, I love her so much, so, Cat, if you’re watching this, this is a public announcement to say that you were the best groomsmaid a man could ask for and, Louise, if _you’re_ watching this, you were the best groomsmaid a Dan could ask for. Or. Something.”

[Phil looks awkward for a few seconds before brightening.]

“Moving on! So Cat was my groomsmaid, Louise was Dan’s, and we both had our brothers as our best men which was honestly so lovely. Louise’s daughter was also flower girl slash ring-bear and did a fantastic job, here are some pictures –”

[Phil waves his hands and several official looking wedding pictures pop up on screen: Dan in a black suit and blue tie, Phil in a blue suit and black tie, both grinning fit to burst; Cat with white hair and a white dress with a blue sash, Louise in the same dress but a black sash and baby blue hair, her daughter in her arms in a blue dress with a black sash. The majority do not contain unknown family members, but PJ, Chris, Felix and Marzia, Carrie, and Tyler are dotted around, smiling.]

“You probably recognise more than a few people in the photos there, all of whom have been given the all-clear to start talking about this kind of stuff online, so watch out for Tyler Oakley posting about a hundred selfies of him and the wedding cake - oh, and this was the wedding cake.”

[The cake pops up on screen: it’s reasonably simple, three white tiers decorated with baby blue flowers. The wedding topper is two men holding hands, with their haircuts and suit colours and something hard to make out on their faces.]

“Aaaaand a close up.”

[A close up reveals that the two men have tiny black whiskers on their faces. Jumpcut to Phil looking slightly shamefaced.]

“We couldn’t resist. People thought it was really funny, though, so I guess it payed off. As for our wedding rings, we got matching ones. You can see them already in Dan’s video so I won’t show them again, but we basically got the exact same wedding ring but in different metals? Mine is made from gold but Dan’s is platinum because he was determined to keep it matching his colour scheme. It does mean he can never wear gold jewellery from now on, though.”

“And then there’s our honeymoon. We were away for two weeks – _two whole weeks_ , I’m still not sure how we managed it – in Japan again, not Tokyo this time, but just kind of travelling around, which was a lot of fun and not stressful at all, but we did manage to stay a few nights in Naoshima which was honestly the most beautiful place I have ever been to and definitely the highlight of our trip – bar the fact it was our honeymoon, of course. We will be uploading a _Day in Our Life_ there in all due course but, until then, you’ll have to just be satisfied with my –”

[Phil’s voice drops very low.]

“ _Serious questions_. I was considering making up a whole bunch of different questions but I thought that Dan had it pretty much covered on his half, so I might just do the exact same thing as him but from my point of view."

[Beat.]

“What, I’m his husband, I’m allowed to copy.”

[Jumpcut to him holding the same notecards that Dan was holding in his video.]

“ _Question one: Mr Howell-Lester, why did you decide to get married?_ …okay, this is going to sound _really_ embarrassing, but far more of it than I am willing to admit was due to Dil proposing to Tabitha. I know, I know, our Sim proposing to his girlfriend is not one of the best reasons to propose to your own actual in the flesh living breathing boyfriend – at least, I hope he’s living and breathing – but Dan’s reaction to it…”

[There’s a pause as Phil looks like he’s almost struggling to find the right words.]

“I’ve never really believed in marriage – we were already living together, we already were already sharing bank accounts, and we have a whole bunch of other legal stuff tying us together anyway – but filming that video made it so, so clear I might not have but that Dan really, really did, and if there is anything that I believe in it’s us. You can even see the moment that I realise that in the video, which made it very hard to edit, if I’m to be honest. So that’s why I did it, that’s why I proposed to him.”

[There's a short pause as Phil looks towards the bottom left of the screen and smiles before his eyes flick back to the camera.]

“ _Question two: why did we decide to come out?_ Pretty much the same reason Dan gave, actually. I’ve never been as against the idea as he has been: in all fairness, I’d had four more years to come to terms with my sexuality than he had, including being pretty comfortably out of the closet at university, so I’ve never held any particular resentment against him for that. I didn’t exactly want to stay in the closet, I didn’t really have any preference either way, but knowing Dan did not want to broadcast our relationship for what it is made me completely fine with staying as we were – but as soon as he made it very clear to me that he wanted to let the gay cat out of the bag, I was totally on board. And it’s nice! It’s nice to be able to talk about Dan like this, to talk about _us_ like this, to call him my husband and things like that, so I definitely do not regret it.”

“ _Question three: so are you, like, gay now?_ …I probably should have said bisexual cat out of the bag when I was answering the last question. No, we both aren't too keen on labeling ourselves, but we both can like anyone regardless of gender - so, yeah, could probably call us bisexual, wouldn't be the end of the world, and both always have been, although I definitely do have a preference for men and Sarah Michelle Gellar. I might make a video about that in the future, a sort of guide to coming to terms with your sexuality, so if you’re struggling please say if you’d like something like that in the comments below.”

“The rest of the questions Dan answered pretty well, I don’t really have anything to add to those, so I’m just going to –”

[Phil throws the notecards over his shoulder. There’s a pause.]

“I don’t know why I did that. Anyway, I think that’s all I wanted to get covered, that was a _lot_ of information in not a lot of time, but please like and comment if you are glad we finally came out and subscribe if you want more videos of Dan literally falling out of a closet and me babbling on about how great my husband is. Bye!”

[He pushes his hands at the screen to cover it for the ending: another glimpse of his wedding ring can be seen before it goes dark.]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is confused, PJ is kickthepj, Chris is crabstickz, Felix and Marzia are pewdiepie and cutiepiemarzia respectively, Carrie is Carrie Hope Fletcher or itswaypastmybedtime, and Tyler is Tyler Oakley.
> 
> Comment if you think Phil is a ray of sunshine!
> 
> edit: as of 11th July 2016, Dil has proposed to Tabitha. AHHHH.


	2. outtakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The "outtakes" for previous chapter. Hopefully left enough at the beginning of each part so that you know when in the video it took place!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vlogging format, all jumpcuts in text. Enjoy!

“So, I’ve somehow managed to acquire a husband –”

[Dan’s voice can be heard from the bottom left of the screen, just as Phil’s was in his own video. Phil keeps glancing that way with a fond look in his eyes and what could be called a dopey smile.]

“Yeah, _somehow_. I’m still here, by the way.”

“ _Bi_ the way.”

“Oh my god. You’ll have to have watched the outtakes of my video to get that joke. Well, probably not, but you should go watch it anyway.”

“Oh, yeah! Dan made a video about us having gotten married and all that, so you should go check that out on his channel, danisnotonfire –”

“Nice plug, there, Phil. Very subtle.”

“Can’t say I’m not a supportive husband now, can you?”

“No, I really can’t, whereas I’m just sort of sitting here so I can make snarky comments.”

“He’s just kind of watching me. It’s been a decade and he’s _still_ stalking me.”

“ _Yes,_ Phil, _thank_ you for that.”

[Jumpcut.]

“– but please feel free to refer to us as whatever, it’s really not a big deal to us –”

“ _Really not a big deal_ , says the man who insisted for _months_ that Lester-Howell sounds better than Howell-Lester.”

“Says the man who seriously suggested that we change our surname to Howlter.”

[A moment of silence as Phil smirks: when Dan finally does speak, he sounds absolutely mortified.]

“I did _not_.”

“You did. I can even call Louise to back me up on this.”

“Oh, god, when?”

“You may have been slightly drunk at the time.”

“…oh _god_.”

[Jumpcut.]

“– but I thought this video might deal more with the fun stuff! Like the wedding!”

“Phil really enjoyed the wedding, guys.”

“I did really enjoy the wedding.”

“No, I mean he _really_ enjoyed it. For a man who says that marriage is just a piece of paper –”

“Are you really starting on that again?”

“Phil, have you _met_ me? Of course I’m starting on this again.”

“I’ve not only met you, I’ve _married_ you, and I think the fact that not only are we married but I _proposed_ clearly counteracts the fact that I said that once, like, three years ago.”

[Sound of movement in the background: Dan appears from the left side of the screen, taking a seat next to his husband on the bed. Phil tries to push him out of the camera line as he talks. Heart Eyes Howell™ is activated.]

“He’s trying to use how he’s only said that once _on camera_ and therefore there’s only proof of him saying it once to hide the fact that he said it at least a _dozen times_ over the space of, like, six years –”

“Well, we’re married now and I couldn’t be more delighted so clearly I was –”

[Phil breaks off. They both looked startled momentarily until Phil closes his eyes and hangs his head back with a quiet groan. Dan’s breath-taking smile doesn’t change, but something in his eyes does: something a little like a wicked glee can be seen as he talks.]

“What was that, sorry? I didn’t quite catch that.”

“Oh, god.”

“You were saying something about being delighted to find out that marriage _is_ more than a piece of paper, and that clearly you were – would you mind finishing that sentence, please? Very rude to just sort of, you know, leave a sentence hanging like that.”

[Phil stares at the camera both enduringly and endearingly as his husband smiles faux-innocently next to him.]

“He’s going to make me do it. He’s going to make me say his three favourite words _on camera_.”

“I am, I am, I am going to make you do it because you know it’s true.”

“Even front of all our followers?”

“The more people that watch this, the better.”

[They stare at each other for a few seconds, Phil slightly grumpy and Dan absolutely delighted, before the former sighs deeply.]

“Fine. Dan, I was wrong. Are you happy now?”

[There’s a dreamy sigh from Dan as he looks off into the distance.]

“This is the best day of my life.”

“He says one month after we got married.”

[Dan collapses back on the bed, gazing up at the ceiling, clearly elated.]

“This is even better than that.”

“Can I continue on with my video now or are you just going to lie there and annoy me for the entire time?”

“Take a guess.”

[Phil glances at the camera conspiringly and glances back to make sure Dan isn’t focusing on him before shoving him off the end of the bed, bursting into laughter as Dan’s eyes pop open and he both flails and fails to regain his balance. A loud thump and a yelp can be heard as his disappears off the edge of the screen.]

“FFFFF, _PHIL_.”

[Jumpcut back to Phil sitting alone on the bed.]

“– but I was not the one who cried through pretty much the entirety of the speeches, so I think I won that argument.”

“Oh, for God’s sake.”

[Sound of movement in the background as Dan comes to sit next to Phil again.]

“Wait, what are you doing? Are you barging into my video _again_?”

“I just want to state for the record here that I did not _cry_ for the _entirety_ of the speeches. I am not going to sit over there and be publicly shamed by my own husband for expressing a perfectly healthy emotional to response to marrying him, okay, I’m not doing it.”

“You did cry, though. Maybe not for the entirety of the speeches, but at least three times.”

“I cried _once_. You try not crying when Louise is babbling on about how great we are after having drunk a few too many glasses of champagne.”

“Dan had so much champagne, I’m pretty sure he got through an entire bottle by himself.”

“It was my _wedding day_. I think I was allowed to have some champagne.”

“And get tipsy enough to sniffle your way through the speeches, apparently.”

“Okay, fine, you win, just don’t come crawling to me when you’re looking through our wedding album in a decade’s time and crying about how young and beautiful I was once I’ve divorced you and taken all your money and subscribers.”

“You’ll still be beautiful in ten years’ time.”

[Something in Dan’s expression breaks as he looks at Phil: his smile widens, his eyes soften, he shakes his head a little as if he can’t quite believe his luck.]

“See? See? This is why I married you.”

“You just won’t be young.”

[The smile drops instantly: Dan turns back to the camera with an expression clearly saying _are you kidding me_? as Phil sniggers next to him.]

“Aaand that was a beautiful moment while it lasted, all five seconds of it. My husband, everyone.”

[Jumpcut, both still on the bed: Dan speaks first.]

“Just scraping in again to tell you that we actually called it The Extravaganza like 90% of the time, embarrassingly enough, if any of you wanted to refer to it as that. Who was it that came up with it, Louise?”

“Yeah, I think it was, yeah.”

“Yeah – yeah, it was Louise, as a joke one time during the planning because she pretty much did all the planning, all we did was get fitted for suits and say ‘I do’, and because we weren’t sure what to call it –”

“– if we wanted to talk about it around anyone who didn’t know, best to have a sort of code name –”

“– yes, Phil, a _code name_ , that’s exactly what it was. So we started calling it ‘the Extravaganza’ as a joke and it just kind of stuck because we are terrible, terrible people. So, yeah, that’s an update on how terribly uncool we are.”

[Jumpcut. Both still on the bed.]

“We’ve made an agreement that Dan can barge into my video as many times as he wants as long as all of it goes in the outtakes and none in my actual video.”

“I still would’ve barged in and, y’know, done as I pleased if we hadn’t made the deal but marriage is compromise and all that, so if any of you are getting married –”

“– unfortunately not to us –”

“– possibly fortunately, actually, considering we’ve proven to be terrible spouses, but if you _are_ getting married, my first advice is to learn how to compromise. Second is to _not_ draw cat whiskers on your face. On the cake is fine, but _not_ your face. Really ruins the wedding pictures.”

 

[Jumpcut. Phil is alone on the bed again.]

“My ring is made from gold but Dan’s is platinum because he was determined to keep it matching his colour scheme.”

“Making marriage emo since 2017, guys.”

“ _The death of a bachelor~_ ”

[Phil sings it in the tune of the Panic! At the Disco song: Dan snorts in the background.]

“Phil, as if either of us have _ever_ been bachelors. We started dating when I was, like, eighteen and you were in your early twenties, and neither of us exactly had Brendon Urie lifestyles before then. Literally, the last time I was properly single was when I was, like, fifteen.”

“We were ‘confirmed’ bachelors for a while there, though.”

“And we all know what _that_ means.”

[Jumpcut.]

“I was considering making up a whole bunch of different questions but I thought that Dan had it pretty much covered on his half, so I might just do the exact same thing as him.”

“So inventive, guys. So creative, you can see why I married him.”

“I’m your husband, I think I’m allowed to answer the same questions that you did in your video.”

“If you say so, dear.”

[Phil shakes his head disapprovingly at the camera. Jumpcut.]

“Okay, this is going to sound really embarrassing, but far more of it than I am willing to admit was due to Dil proposing to Tabitha –”

“Phil, it sounds really embarrassing because it _is_ really embarrassing.”

[Dan enters the screen again, holding his left hand to the camera so his ring can clearly be seen.]

“The Sims. That is why he put a ring on it. Because our _Sim_ got married. Honestly, he’s lucky I love him, otherwise I would’ve been out of here like –”

[Dan clicks his fingers.]

“– _that_.”

[Jumpcut. Only Phil is on the bed.]

“– at least, I hope he’s living and breathing –”

“Oh, my god, Phil.”

[Jumpcut.]

“– which made it very hard to edit, if I’m to be honest.”

“Yeah, if you guys think _I’m_ heart eyes for Phil, you should see that video. It’s honestly embarrassing, I’m surprised he didn’t propose right on the spot.”

“I was tempted to.”

“See, told you. Proposing in the middle of playing the Sims. Absolutely mortifying. And do you know what the worst thing is?”

“What?”

“Still would’ve said yes.”

“Dan and Phil, being the nerdiest couple alive since 2009.”

[Jumpcut.]

“Dan is being uncharacteristically quiet while I’m talking about why we haven't come out before now.”

“I am being shamed in my own home, by my own husband, I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now.”

[Jumpcut.]

“– to call him my husband, to talk about how much I love him without – uh, Dan, you okay?”

[Dan’s voice sounds a little off when he replies.]

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.”

“Dan’s crying again.”

“I am _not_ crying.”

“This is payback for saying I was crying in your video.”

“But you _were_.”

[Phil points at the camera, face faux-serious.]

“ _Reckoning._ ”

[Jumpcut.]

“– although I definitely do have a preference for men and Sarah Michelle Gellar –”

“– and for me.”

“And for Dan. _Definitely_ for Dan.”

[Jumpcut to Phil throwing the notecards over this shoulder.]

“I don’t know why I did that.”

“You’re tidying that up, you know. I’m not doing it.”

[Phil looks a bit put upon as he looks to the bottom left of the screen.]

“I’m going to have to refilm that now.”

[Dan laughs.]

“Even better, you have to tidy it up twice.”

[Phil shakes his head disapprovingly at the camera.]

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Dil proposed to Tabitha.
> 
>  
> 
> *side eyes Phil*


End file.
